Is it challenging for you to ask for what you want or need?

This week’s energy theme (hexagram 19, I’Ching) is about how we care for each other as members of a tribe, community, family, workspace, etc. We can do this from a point of view of codependency (I need you), independence (I don’t need anyone) or interdependence (I’m part of a bigger picture).

Quick check-in:
Do you need to be wanted or want to be needed? Do you give, give, give in order to get, get, get, but the “getting” never seems to come to you and you feel hurt? (codependent)

Do you feel uneasy having to depend on others and therefore do everything you can to do as much as you can by yourself? Or perhaps you’d like to depend on others but believe you can’t because… you’re single… you live alone… or the people you live with can’t or won’t help in the way you want/need them to. (independent)

Do you live your life being both supported by others and giving support to them in a fairly balanced exchange? (interdependent)

Every exchange begins with you approaching someone or being approached by someone else.

This weekend, our very good friend, Rachel McGarry, Canadian singer/songwriter and devotional chant artist, is running a kickstarter campaign to help fund her new album, She Rises. It’s been inspiring to watch her ask for support and money to help contribute to her efforts at completing this album. She has no ounce of shyness to ask because she believes in her work, her mission, and her message. She’s having so much fun creating a buzz around her project and has found unique ways to give back to her supporters. Rachel knows it takes a village to create an album! Being aware of the interconnectedness of life, and how we all need each other, she doesn’t let fear stop her from asking for contributions!

Here are some questions to ponder or to journal about regarding this week’s energy theme of need, want and approach.

Do you dare ask for what you want or need?
How do you approach your boss, your lover, your child, or your friend when you find yourself “needing” something from them even as simple as an answer to a question?

Do you see yourself as a valuable contribution to others?

How does being supported feel in your body? How does it feel in your body when you are not supported?

Do you trust yourself enough to ask for what you want or need? 

How does it feel when you approach others with a request, especially with some of the more weighted “needs/wants” such as money, time or labour?

How does it feel when others approach you, asking for help of any kind? What makes it easier to give to some people more than others?

Do you trust others enough that they will respond with an honest “yes” or “no” to your request? Do you feel hurt/rejected if they say “no”… and do you let that stop you from asking again?

On a scale of 1-10, is it easy or difficult for you to say “no” to someone else’s request of support from you?

This week’s theme is also about being sensitive or insensitive to the needs of those in your tribe, which includes you. If you’re insensitive to these needs, you’re likely functioning from judgement, expectations and projections, which only solidifies your feelings of being alone and cut off. Part of being sensitive is being aware that you could be rejected. The fear of being rejected can make you dismiss your needs or wants… and make you not want to approach anyone.

Yet when you approach others with the awareness that you have something of value to contribute and so do they, how might that change the ways that you’ve been approaching others?

Lots to ponder and track this week, indeed! Make sure to watch/listen to the meditation as it will help you experience being able to open up to the delicious energies of interdependence and interrelatedness.

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With caring & support,

Juna and Sabine